It has been nearly nine months since the universe decided to shake-up the snow globe of my life.
The first couple of months at my new job, it was a rare day that I didn’t cry at the unexpected change. My bosses understood, and I am grateful for their patience with me.
These days tears only show up when I explain my change in job, and the circumstances around it.
Six months after the job change I tossed my proverbial hat in the ring for a Student Success Librarian position. Near the end of September I learned my application was not going on to the next level/ tier/ step.
I’ve also been keeping an eye out for staff positions in the library that are on campus and tap more into are on campus and tap more into my communication / outreach skills than my current job, and inquired with library HR if they are aware of any positions that may be forthcoming.
Last month I finally decided that if I wanted to find a position on-campus that better utilizes my strengths, I needed to explore non-library options. There are a myriad of facets to that decision, so sometimes one of them will make me doubt I should leave the library, rather continue to be patient to see what else may come – after all, I spent the time to get my MLIS, and have worked in this library, in various positions, for a bit over 13 years. And on the whole, I generally like my colleagues in the library, and it would sadden me to leave what has for ~12 years a positive work experience.
Then my focus shifts slightly to another facet, and I feel, suddenly unseen for what I have done for the libraries, for working at what many librarians have told me is at faculty level – that if/when I got a librarian position, I’d be half-way to tenure. And yet, I’ve been at my current rank of Library Associate II for six years.
So I secured references and have started searching the UF Jobs site for opportunities that call to me.
I am so scared because, as a former boss used to say “change is hard, Barbie.” This is true, even if the end results are positive, and even if it is a change I am actively seeking out. But it is time to pick up that snow globe, give it a shake, and wait to see where things settle.
